sunnuntaina, joulukuuta 31, 2000

Im back!!

HAPPY NEW YEAR

I tell everything later...Im so tired.

sunnuntaina, joulukuuta 31, 2000

lauantaina, joulukuuta 23, 2000

MERRIER XMAS for all of you!

lauantaina, joulukuuta 23, 2000

Urgh. Its 2.23...My sister spend eternity front of the computer, chatting with her friend Eric via icq...I dyed my hair. Tho, I didnt have that haircut today. My hairdresser was ill. Nicey. I heard about it when I arrived there and waited forever. 'Oh have you waited here long? She's ill, Im sorry. Can you come in next week?' I just smiled nicely and arranged new time but I wanted to replace my 'Merry Xmas'-line with 'screw you' ;) Ok...Still, this color I have now...its more reddish. Its alive. Its beautiful. Its best color I've ever had! Its so me! . . . I should pack. I havent done it yet. I have no idea what to take with me. Im going to sleep few hours before train which leave at 6am-> Oh my...

Ok. Eka and Jani visited here today! I got my Xmas gift from her which was beautiful over cute teddypolarbear - handmade all by herself! Its SO cute. I have to take photo of it and send it online!! ITS SO CUUTE! Im going to scream soon, its so cute. I also got Sailormoon stickers. Senni gave me X-files action figure Dana Scully which is totally cool, believe it or not...plus Jane Austens 'Emma', which is one of my romantic classic favorites. Mother cave me skecth-book and pens. Granma and Granpa cave me huge box of chokolate, parfume and 100mk money. Somekind of little Xmas here, cause Im leaving...

I bought cd's...Portishead's portishead (I adore it...all mine is most greatest song, I've been drooling for that cd like ages, and now it was quite cheap.) and PJ Harvey's 'is this desire'...Both were cheaper than usually. Im happy. They were Xmas gift for myself.

I really should start to pack. So...this will be last blog for awhile (4days)...North tomorrow, or today actually. Snow, cold and Xmas. Ah. Food food and rest. Sleep. A lot of it. See you later!! *throws a snowball to your back* Tihihiii...

lauantaina, joulukuuta 23, 2000

perjantaina, joulukuuta 22, 2000

Ah. Im so tired. My back hurt again...I think this is the every winter thing. I should get those muscle relaxants again...more...more!! When I came to work today it was snowing heavily. Everything was white. Now its rainy, water, and all that pure glittering white snow is melted away...This is chaos. Im death tired and hell I just want to get outta here. I need rest. Cause Im so tired and my back hurts all the time, I worry about this job and I do stupid mistakes cause Im under a pressure that my boss lands on my arms. Sigh. Tomorrow at 6am I hop in the train and 8h there and *PUF* Im in north, Iisalmi! Aahh! I hug myself about that thought.

Yesterday I got those new songs from Jukka. 2 totally new, one with my vocals - new version, and one song that isnt really realated about me. Its Saga single, that Jukka made for his realatives and friends. He recorded his baby's voice and gigling and made song for it. Its so cute! :)) Well...I always do music when I curl myself in intimate state of my thoughts and beats wearing headphones. I cannot do anything if others also hear that music...Ok. I was listening those songs with my walkman cd-player yesterday. I left it on the table. I heard *CRASH* when Nobody and dog was playing/fighting and cat jumped on the table and dropped it. Its been dropping from places many times, but now...It doesnt roll any cd's anymore. It takes power and opens itself, but never start to play cd's...I dont know what to do...Its quite new, I havent even pay it yet. I cannot send it back and wait for new one...It doesnt work that way. And I dont have money to get new one. Theyre expensive! Its like I've lost friend. I cried last night alone in my room, cause I felt so gloomy about it. How can I do music now? Its my only cd player anyway, cause I dont own any stereos anymore. It was always with me...And this traintrip Im having tomorrow and when I come back...8h without music in space which is full of stangers side by side. When I think about my heart start to beat fast and I get panic...What Im going to do?! Argh!!! I know Im pathetic, but I cannot be without it. And moving things like train, car or bus are places Im always best when I write lyrics. I always do my best in train. And now I have two long traintrips alone and...I will loose good change. Ok...Im already sore. ;)

Ah. Quite quiet day...one brittish human who looks totally irish just came in. I love to get touch with foreing ppl!

There positive things today to:
I'll have haircut today after work! I already bought new color, Im going to dye it tonight. Im so happy! Im going to be clear red again. Look in the mirror after it makes me happy. And then Eka and Jani will come to meet me and Senni tonight at 6.30pm...also grannies will visit us. And then I dye my hair, play and cuddle with Nobody, pack, idle and then sleep and early early wake up and then train. Im going to miss Nobody. Just 4days without him. My heart cries. He's everything to me. Tho, he was playfull last night and striked to kill my hand all the time, and now my right hand looks like I've cut it with a knife. Im not angst teen. Ahahha!

Yesterday I bought late bday gift for Senni. Beautiful violet shirt with glitter text '1980'...the year when best star wars movie came out! I saw it and I thought what a beautiful color!! and that lila glitter! I felt that I have to get it for Senni. And she loved it! Its like made for her. She looks so beautiful with it, her hair color shine and green eyes...its 100% hers. Im so happy that she liked it.

These are my last blogs...Im off for 4 days then. Miss me ok? ;)

I have to write bunch of emails today for everyone. mm laters.

perjantaina, joulukuuta 22, 2000

torstaina, joulukuuta 21, 2000

Its so cold. Im wearing my new skirt...black 40's style of with white dots...stare it 5minutes and your eyes start to hurt! ;) brrr...

torstaina, joulukuuta 21, 2000

Phew. Im death tired. Dunno even why, cause I slept long (well one hour more than usually) and such. Outside its foggy and white all around. Its winter now, officially. Now its shortest day in winter. Whoah. My granma called me while ago, theyre coming to meet us tomorrow. Also Eka and maybe Jani will come too. Nicey! :) Today its thursday which means, that Larpcafe is open 6pm. Im going to meet Sami da photographer there too, were going to plan Kaisa's make up. Were starting to shoot her part for photo-project after new year. Yay!

Oh...Its so cold out there. Im drinking morning coffee right now, feeling totally tired. When Mario came here today (I was a bit early opening this place) he came with post...I was making coffee in kitchen and when I came back this side, I saw a envelode on the table, yellow one, with my name on it. And address was to -> Blue Apple Netcafe! I went to ask Mario 'what is this' he said that he dont know, it came via post. Strange, I thought and opened it. Oh! It was ChupaChup lollipop Xmas-card from yev!! Oh Kawaiiii! Im so happy, its best suprise I've got in ages! She know that all I do is eating lollipops, but that was just something...I have to mail her today and thank her. So sweet.

torstaina, joulukuuta 21, 2000

Im death tired and on my way to bed. Work day was wonderfull...so hectic! I was home after 8pm cause I spend 3h at city which was full of ppl running around getting Xmas gifts. My legs hurt. Im listening my favorite song from Björk's Post...enjoy...aah I love it! This part : 'How can I ignore / This is sex without touching' I wish I could write that kind of lines too. So pure! Aah. Well, everyone has own way to write stuff. Yay. Tomorrow I'll get 4 new songs in cd from Jukka, which means I got a lot to do! Whee.

When I came back home from work/city sky was all clear and stars were shiny. I was walking home from bus stop, I paused my walk beat for sec and stared up...sky was glittering, clouds hurried away fast. It was another magical moment...Nighty Bless.

torstaina, joulukuuta 21, 2000

keskiviikkona, joulukuuta 20, 2000

ahahha. Im so amused! I dont usually get a lot of private msg:s in IRC...but today in one hour like 5. different person who with I dont usually talk outside of the #tolkien started to chat with me. And they all first were like how are, what are you Xmas plans...and then 'Oh btw, How things are with you and Nume?'...Ahahahah :)) This is hilarious.

keskiviikkona, joulukuuta 20, 2000

My dad is making all Xmas goods and foods ready in north. He called me yesterday and Im so happy that I can go there. We edited our documentary about 'our life' last night. We (my twin sis and I) made it for dad, cause he recorded us when we was kids, so we put it and this new thing in same pack as a gift. We know that he's going to love it. We made still-picture animations which includes Senni's teddybear, teddy bunny, few starwars action figure and Toy Story 2 Dino action figure. Theyre so goddamn funny, we put hilarious music in it and all. It was fun to do and fun to edit. Its fun to see will Dad like it. Hee.

I hope I will meet Band in Kni. Sari is going to deliver that baby alive in any minute before New year. I hope it will happend when Im there. I dont want to hear it via phone. I've been waiting it so much! I also would love to meet others...Mika...Hänki...all. We'll see. I wait this Xmas so much! Aah! Whee.

keskiviikkona, joulukuuta 20, 2000

Im in fantastic mood! I woke up very early like 8am or something. It was dark and minus degrees! COLD! :)) Me and my sister decided to go to city same time, cause I had to check did I get my money today or not! Anyway...On our way to bus stop...it was foggy and glittering all around. It was so freezing. I love it! Ground was icy. It was like someone sparkled some silver and white glitter everywhere. Im starting to get myself into Xmas-mood slowly. I GOT MY MONEY! I checked it on my way to work while ago...Aaah!

S7L called me yesterday before Ko Gals. We had long and fun conversation. I enjoy to talk with him...always so much. Movie was nice like always. I was death tired last night and I still am. Oh Winter wonder land.

keskiviikkona, joulukuuta 20, 2000

tiistaina, joulukuuta 19, 2000

I started to read Banana Yoshimoto's Amrita today. It feels already perfect. It has something very ordinary in it. Im addicted. I've been reading it all day! Soonish in 30min I run home to read some more. Ooh today theyre showing one of my favorite movie in tv!! Go-Gals! Kaiwaiii!!! :))

tiistaina, joulukuuta 19, 2000

Im very tired. I slept like 4h in night. My eyes are sore and they ache, still Im feeling very ok. Sky is clear and sun is shining inside this cafe. I feelso chrystal clear somehow. Its chaos.

I hate this. I wrote long mail to Mencer yesterday and I send it...iobox went down and It disappeard. Also today few minutes ago I wrote again very long mail to Yuri and *Puff* when I send it, it disapperd. Grr. Im going to count to ten now, slowly. Slowly. Anyway! Its been quite busy workday again. I feel so happy about it...I've been up to something all day. I woke up 7am, went to city to 9am, went to have lunch with mum at 10am, opened this place at 11am...Now I have 3h of this and then home...Ooh. Its so beautiful. Sunrays are hitting to the yellow walls of this place. Air and sky outside is pale blue. Its color of sparkling ice.

I got mail from Jukka, he put new songs in cd to me tomorrow, so I'll get them just before Im leaving for Xmas. Great! I love to get something to do! Yay! Im almost done with 'Al Dente' and I have so much to sing about so...ready or not, here I come.

I get my money tomorrow!! See how Im dancing. tralalaa. I havent got any Xmas gift yet, so I have to hurry! I dont have any idea about anything...Im like starting my Xmas one month late! ;) Ahah. I just noticed that Im going to spend my new year all alone. Senni is with Tuomas, Eka is with Jani somewhere, Mum is with Pentti and I dont really care about theyre company cause my pain in the ass little sister is there. I dont have any friends around here and such. I dont have pile of money, so I cannot travel to north. Im feeling so empty. But I think I drink some wine and watch fireworks all night long. Well...

tiistaina, joulukuuta 19, 2000

Oh. Im listening Wayne Gratz and drinking hot tea. I just watched movie 'Piano' from tv...Its beautiful, music in it is indeed beatiful. Love in it is beautiful. No, Im not romantic person at all...I just well...like nice stories. I like when theres love around me. I like when there's happy couples that love eachothers, cause I know that I cannot be like that. mm...maybe Im too moody again.

In saturday morning Im going to heat to Kajaani. Well...In Iisalmi. Were going to jump off from the train there, meet granma and friends and then drive to Kajaani. Nice plan, I must say.

My cello lesson was fantastico! I had fun...Were having two week brake now. Xmas time. Everyone is sleeping and eating pork. When I was leaving Surf City, closing the door and thinking about which bus I should catch to be on time in my lesson...Suddenly...It started to snowing! It was so magical. I just stared up and saw how sky was full of little snowstars falling slowly down. I walked around the city, waiting my bus. It was cold. I felt so happy. I was full of Xmas feeling after it, my first 'Merry Christmas!' sentence was for my cello teacher. Well...my lesson ended and I went to bus stop. I noticed that I have to wait 20mins til next bus. It was cold, cello's dont really like cold. So! I walked. I walked to city in cold cold air, snow around me, lights by the river, ppl with dogs...When I was on my bus stop in the city, bus left without me. I was like 0.001sec too late. So! I had to wait another 15mins in the city. Bus was full of drunk ppl and it make me feel sick. I dont want to see them. I dont want to see, how someone talks to his kid via phone, totally drunk (looked like there was more than alhocol in him) and saying that yeah I will come soon, next time I'll be totally sober, tell that to granma, ok? ... I felt so sick. So! I jumped of from bus and walked home. It took 1.5h to get home after that goddamn lesson! :) Duh. But we have snow!! :) Tho It might be water now... Its not that cold that It could stay. Oh well...

Tomorrow early wake up at 7am something. Im so tired to even think about it. Long day, -again-! I already wait to get back to Blue Apple. Tomorrow also my boss is back from his trip, so its me and him again. And its so goddamn quiet there at Xmas time. No one stop by. I was so bored there today...we had a lot of customers, but not that much. I was alone almost all the time. I wait and I wait. I want to go.

I got postcard from Yuri! My penpal from Japan! Aah! Im so happy! I have to write her back soonish! :D I send her card last week, but it takes time. Finrod said that he got my Xmas-card today...I send a bunch of them, so we'll see will everyone get theyre own. I dont really trust to my mum, when theres a huge pile of postcards and just few are from me to someone. They somehow always disappear somewhere. Oh well.
I have to go...Im in singing mood. So see me how I float! I dont get any nice words out from me, cause Im so empty. Its christmas and I miss my old friends. I dont really think they care. But that's life. I've had this stuff inside me life so much, that it really doenst feel about anything. Well they can have fun together then. Duh.
I love Nobody. He's my biggest love in the world. Never harm me, always there, soft and gentle. mm...I need to sleep. Nighty Bless!

tiistaina, joulukuuta 19, 2000

maanantaina, joulukuuta 18, 2000

mm. Im so tired. I have cello lesson at 18.15 and my hands are already ice cold. Well, that's life.

Ali promised to see will he find Hotei's records from moscov. There is one store that sell japanese records and he went check that place...they said that they had hotei, and dont know when they get more...well...we'll see! 8) Happy! :)

maanantaina, joulukuuta 18, 2000

Shall I order Hotei's Fetish, or not...What a problem! I hate this...hum. One hour and then Im outta here!! :))

maanantaina, joulukuuta 18, 2000

Im drinking coffee in empty cafe where Im working. My boss is out from the country again, so Im keeping business alone. Tomorrow he'll back again. I close this place at 17. He called me about this yesterday. He left keys to Blue Apple and I pick them from there, and came here. I left my cello in Blue. My lesson starts at 18.15. Yay.

In saturday morning Im going to catch train and travel to Kajaani. In last saturday...that little Xmas party. It was fun - good music, many bottle of Ginger Ale, dancing and laught. Anna, Senni's almost-roommate...She's so lovely. Anyway...after it we was waiting bus in cold night. City was full of drunk party ppl and clock was something 'bout 1am. There was two violist front of marketplace playing perfect celtic music! It was magical! When I was listening it I forgot how cold it was and little rainy. At home I started to listen music. My mother and my aunt was still awake and in party mood, we ate a lot of everything good like wines and cheeses, sherry...I irc'ed a bit and started to sleep after 4am.

Sunday...Ah. Yesterday was perfect! I slept to 4pm. My step-mother called so I had to get up then. I spend whole day idling...mm. I feel like sleeping right now. Im bored that its so goddamn perfect day, this whole place is empty...sun is shining. I drink coffee to stay awake and sappy. :)

Oh...Im going to order one cd from cd japan...Hotei's Fetish...I spoke about this with ali] in irc and he said that hey, they have this store in Moskov where they sell Japanese cd's...He's going to check that place in his lunchbrake! He also can get Hotei's Supersonic Generation for me in 2months If I want it. YAY! I've tried everything...I've already tried bol once and they didnt get anything for me, tho it was in online catalog. Duh. Well I keep my fingers crossed! ^o^ Happy happy joy joy.

Oh my. Im already hungry.

I woke up today at 8am. I drank a lot of coffee and made song called 'al dente's melody ready and almost finnished lyricks also. Im pretty happy about it.

Im free to be what ever I want to be...Im freee....
Yesh! Laters.

maanantaina, joulukuuta 18, 2000

lauantaina, joulukuuta 16, 2000

Here's two of those pics we took with Senni last night. Tihih. Me, myself and my otherside. We look totally like identical twin sisters. ;) Ok...Rahmaninov was amazing. It was something...so beautiful that when they started to play I was crying. That power of live music...They moved theyre hands, but sound was quiet and floating around. When they played loud, it just care my ears softly. It was touching. It was alive. That pianist was goddamn amazing! When he played some fast parts you hardly saw his hands cause he played so fast but still clearly. Ppl shouted 'bravo' and claped theyre hands till he came back on stage and played one little piano song which was very childhis and playfull, he played everything with sparkle in his eye. I have to put that name in my mind. But...well...It was my dream come true to hear that piano concerto live. It was hard for cello's too. I just stared theyre hands and faces...How can I ever play notes like that. Theyre faces were red after that concerto was over, and everyone in that orchestra smiled with big faces, director hugged pianist, audience shouted bravo and clapped like madmans, whole orchestra drummed floor with theyre feets...It was like goal in foodball game! ;) And when I came back to home while ago, sky was clear and stars were glittering. So fragile! So now some wine and Philip Glass Secret Agent ost. Ah!

lauantaina, joulukuuta 16, 2000

perjantaina, joulukuuta 15, 2000

all neon like...relaunch!

perjantaina, joulukuuta 15, 2000

LOL! What happends when Santa, perfect man and perfect woman meets? Tihih, check this out.

perjantaina, joulukuuta 15, 2000

Jukka mailed me, quite long time from last one. Anyway...he's sending me cd were is 2 totally new sorb songs, one song we've been working (working name is "soulsong") awhile...let's see what he have done. Whee. I love to get new stuff to work with. We're working al dente, "soulsong", possible one "breakbeat" song and jazzy stuff. Great!! :D Im happy.

Im so tired, my eyes feel like I cannot keep them open any longer. Im yawning all the time, I feel hazy. I made a mistake with customer and my boss didnt really look happy. Im so tired that I cannot thing clearly. Fuck. Im so embrased. Fuck. We lost like 6FIM...not much, but still money. I hate to do those things, I dont know Im like child who always screw up everything ;)) Im happy that today is friday...Sleep sleep. Tomorrow those little X-mas parties! What im going to wear?! I havent been into party in ages..."party". Well I decided that I dont really care what I wear, Its nonsense. ;) Tihih. Another test "what's your flavor"...my result was that Yum! Im jalapeño. Spicy and festive, you're as tasty as they come! . . . sick.

perjantaina, joulukuuta 15, 2000

Oh This one is totally Xmas day...this place have been quite empty and its rainy, Nume made visit here gave mine and Senni's gits...and we talked. Oh my that Jani's sushi was great! And Im so tired that my eyes feel sore and if I dont write this right now, I would fall asleep. And my hands shake cause I've drank too much coffee anyway. Few cups of Mario's coffee is 6 cups of ordinary one ;) How can it be like this...so rainy. At morning when I was walking to bus stop it was light everywhere, still rainy and it was like picture from heaven. In the bus I watched landscapes and everything was glittering, raindrops hitted in the water that was slowly moving on the road and that splash was shape of star...beautiful.

perjantaina, joulukuuta 15, 2000

Im in blue apple, closing it and putting sign on the door. I was at Surf City while ago...Jani came there to give me my Xmas gift...and quess what it was...It was 8 piece of sushi fresh from Tokyo! Theyre close that place after new year and Jani know that I dont have any money to visit there before it...He's jewel...Im running back in Surf City now, to eat it. Yummy. It smells totally wonderfull! Kiah!

Thank you Jamie, who ever you are, your email was lovely and made me smile! ^_^

perjantaina, joulukuuta 15, 2000

How tired human can be. Im death tired right now, but I know that I'll get myself awake soonish...

perjantaina, joulukuuta 15, 2000

torstaina, joulukuuta 14, 2000

Im going to be Misato when I grown up. ;)
Im in good mood, tho my leather pants didnt come from H&M...they were sold out. How nicey. Im listening Chroma Key right now, and feeling extremely tired. Im so full of everything that has something to do with depression of ppl, work, Xmas...I want to get away. But Im better tomorrow.

I had great day at work...yes I was in Surf City today...I had a lot of customers. Tomorrow back to Blue Apple. Which is ok, I like that place too but its so idle. Day went flying with some action. And pleasant was that all those ppl was so nice. I love to be able to meet new faces and kind persons all the time. And one face I know came in too, Which was very funny, cause he was pretty suprised about me there. Well...Aah...my plan for next days:
Thursday [tomorrow]: Therapy, going to pay one bill, work, then when clock hits 19 Im out from Blue and heating to Cafe Noir to meet everyone. And spend jolly time. Then home.
Friday: Ok. I dont have money to go to UB's gig. Senni go, cause Tuomas pays. So I go to listen Rahmaninov's piano concerto 3. after work at 19.30 with my mother. I think it will be fantastico!
Saturday: I wake up, watch Star Trek Voyager. Then clean da place. Later at afternoon/night Friends and relatives will be here, visiting us, cause we have those so called official party of my mother's 40 years bday. Before 10pm me, Senni and Anna are going to see each others and go to Larpers little Xmas party. Yay. Maybe. I think I go even. I dont really have better to do, and spend time with jolly ppl...of course I'll go.
Sunday: Sleep. So long, so much. Eternety.

Ok I dont usually plan my life more than few hours ahead, but now I really didnt have anything better to do. Someone...heal my bleeding heart.

Now, I sound pathetic, forgive me, this night time makes me like it...and maybe this music. If I put Neon Genesis Evangelion soundtrack on it heals every aching nerve in me. Im so sensitive for some things and it brakes me. I dont want to work in place, where boss hates me or things Im bad or such. I try so hard, I try to do everything well...I put myself my time and such in that fucking cafe. I do so much things that I dont even have to do, Its not my job to run that place, It doenst belong in my job-agreement. Im not real worker there, he doesnt pay me nothing. City of Turku pay for me to work there...Sigh...

I start to be over tired. I should wrote some mails...mm...no, Nighty!

torstaina, joulukuuta 14, 2000

keskiviikkona, joulukuuta 13, 2000

ooh. I love humans from time to time. This one I get from ali] few minutes ago in irc, he was already gone when I noticed it...he's jewel!
[13:38] < ali] > @}--,--'--
How lovely! :)

keskiviikkona, joulukuuta 13, 2000

Im more better now, tho I didnt really sleep at night, cause I was so worried. That feeling was gone at morning and now Im fine, tho death tired. I've opened this place and everything seems to be ok. I hope even ;) Oh well...Im reading book about ccs and right now using 'puter to write this. Im not really into mood of sitting here. Ahha. One very great customer came here today...I was playing Keiko's whisper from the mirror and he was 'Oh my this is good music!!'...this place is full of ppl all the time. My heart pump faster cause Im so tired. And maybe somehow having a little a bit stress. Im like in country I dont know, In another net cafe I've never worked in, which has everything differently...But tomorrow...Tomorrow Im back In Blue Apple. What a joy, really. 4½h and Im out from here too. Sigh. What a pleasure. Ahaha. I made ÄÖ test again...now I made it same as I was doing my job with 3 different customers and result was 123 :P Plaah.

This place is full of ppl all the time. I'll write more when Im alone...

keskiviikkona, joulukuuta 13, 2000

Learning Perl - tomorrow Im going to read this all day. Swich my head in another world, I remember how I got my head off from this world ages ago...coding some stupid silly stuff...uuh. Ouchie. Yay.

keskiviikkona, joulukuuta 13, 2000

Im feeling sick. After that one stupid dramatic scene that Mario did. 'dont play any games with me'. I still try to think what did he mean. I dont know. I have no idea. Im shaky. I dont feel like going to work tomorrow. I hate it, cause I so badly want to do my best, cause, well... this is my first REAL work, and I need it! I wont go and mess it up. Goddamnit. I dont know what to do. Well...I try to clear my head and sleep some and forget that thing, cause In thursday I possible meet him, and hopefully he'll speak his mouth clear. I think this situation is unfare. Its so unfare that I'll lose my mind soonish. Really.

Im tired also. So tired that my eyes hurt. Tomorrow early wake up. I have to be there at 11.00 to open surf city.

Im not depressed or anything...Im just so fucking tired. One thing - If someone have something to say - say it straight to the face in that very same minute. I love my job, I love to meet new ppl everyday. I had very rich day mentally today too (if we dont count my shaky feeling that was inside me after that slogan) with customers. Sigh.

Ahahha, last night we spend like 3h in studio, and today one film was ruined in photography store!!! Sami (photographer) didnt want to make them by himself, cause he wanted to be sure, that they will be fine...but ahhaha...gee, half from the material is gone. 8) We'll have to re-take everything possible. Eh. How nicey.

Im so neurvous about tomorrow that my ears keep humming.

I just want to hug someone and feel that im in save. Everyone is asleep right now and Im so totally alone.

I wait for thursday -> I get back into Blue Apple, then after it maybe Mario talk to me ('Lotta, we have to talk when I get back'), after work into Larp cafe see all those happy faces and spend sec out from this world (I need it, I need it now.)... In friday...Im not going to go to observatory. Im going to listen Rahmaninov's 3th Piano Concerto (my favorite)...and after all, I would love to go to meet everyone, but I cannot face Petrus, my heart is still empty in that place what he ripped off...what a friend.

Some stranger wrote strange msg in my gbook.

Oh. I love these cd's I got today from S7L! :) Im going to write list here, maybe tomorrow, Im too tired. Soonish to bed, just finnishing my tea. Bless.

keskiviikkona, joulukuuta 13, 2000

tiistaina, joulukuuta 12, 2000

Im a lot better. Listening ayreon and getting Mario's old worker here (how's great person, she visit me from time to time in Blue Apple too) to idle with me. She's going to teach me to but all things down and close this place. Tomorrow I have to open this at 11am. Ok. Nicey. Im tired. Im so tired. Mum will be here in any sec and Im waiting for her. 15mins and Im out. Im feeling so much better. So much better now. I think this whole thing with my boss, Mario, is just some miss understanding. Sigh. I helped Nasim with scanning and one girl with finding proper cheap flying tickets to london! :) She was totally out with computers and I took another computer and started to search stuff, cause she just losted her temperature in minute and gave up. And ircking with S7L and folks in helped me too. Oh I love 'em. OK...mm...laters

tiistaina, joulukuuta 12, 2000

Im going out from my mind...My boss called me today, that I have to go to Blue Apple (the net cafe Im working in) and put sign on the door, that it will be closed next few days. I was like mmok...Then he said that he really have to go to Helsinki today, you will come here to keep this place up...I came, he gave me money to buy milk, I went, I came back and he gave me keys and said that one of his friend will come here today and teach me to how to close everything...ok...So tomorrow I have to open (11am) and close this (6pm). I was ok with everything...then when he was leaving he asked me, I went in the backroom...he said 'Lotta, we have to talk when I get back.' I said ok. then he add 'Dont play games with me'...I was like 'errm...I dont play any games'. He looked me and left da building. Im going to broke down in little pieces. What is this? What in earth he's talking about? I dont cheat, I dont play any games. Im going to start to cry soon...My tummy hurts...Im loosing my mind soon enough. Will I lose my job? Have I dont everything not that well that I thought...Is something wrong and does he things that I've stole something or such. I dont know what to do. I dont know what is going on?!!! I dont have any idea about anything. Oh my god. Help me.

Happy birthday Mother! ^_^ *handle some flowers* May your years be better than past ones! *hugs*

I got 9 cd's via post from S7L today!! :)))))) IM SO HAPPY. Im listening Keiko right now. It heals my heart a bit right now...a bit. Oh my. Im shaky. I hate this, I hate when someone say things like that and then leave. I hate it. I hate it. I have no idea about anything right now. Sigh.

tiistaina, joulukuuta 12, 2000

maanantaina, joulukuuta 11, 2000

Yukio Mishima sounds very interesting...one of my friend has some kind of fanatic boom to read all stuff he can find. I should peek some too. Thanks to me, he's also fan of Banana Yoshimoto. Which is...great.

Today I woke up at 8am. I cannot believe that...tho I feel totally tired. mm. Cello lesson was great like usually. After it my teacher drove me to city, suddenly my phone started to rang, it was S7L. I was climbing out from the huge crysler car she have, trying to keep phone with right hand, and cello and back and close the door with another in the middle of the city among all those cars...It was hectic, that I just started to laugh. And I didnt really hear what he said, so I was 'what, whaaat?' all those few first secs. Then I was just over top too sappy and laughed about everything. We talked like 15min and after it I was so happy and enertic. I also was hungry. I was starving, 'til about an hour ago my mother runned here with two yummy rolls and with my favorite feta-salad. She gave them to me, and said that eat, you have a long day, and runned away to catch a bus. Oh god I love her! I feel so good now. My tummy dont hurt and all I do is wait for coffee to be ready. Im so full of warm feeling. Laters.

maanantaina, joulukuuta 11, 2000

mm interesting. This what my name tells about me:
LOTTA
The name of Lotta has given you sensitivity and appreciation for the finer and deeper things in life. You can enjoy reading, study, and contemplation about many different subjects. When your interests or curiosity are aroused, you work intensely at new undertakings, but your interests often wane when you encounter drudgery and monotony, with the result that you leave many things unfinished. Your name has taken you into many bitter experiences. The greatest lack in your life is stability and peace of mind. A peaceful and quiet environment, especially out in nature, is one of your greatest desires, but you are constantly taken into chaotic conditions. Because you have high ideals and are a principled person, you have been disillusioned and disappointed in people on many occasions and have experienced much aloneness. You are fond of outdoor sports, where you can find an outlet for your nervous energy. Impulsiveness could bring frequent accidents and unfortunate happenings into your life. You do not like to be restricted or to have your freedom curtailed in any way. You find it difficult to control your thoughts and could swing in moods from one extreme to the other. Your speech can become very critical and sarcastic when you are frustrated or crossed. This name creates a weakness in the heart, lungs, and bronchial organs, and could cause heart trouble, pneumonia, asthma, or tuberculosis. It also creates tension in the nervous system, particularly the solar plexus and stomach, causing nervous indigestion and relative conditions.
Tihih! This really sound me...tho, Im not really into outdoor sports, but when Im full of energy and I get unpatient I have to go run or such...always...here's another one:
GENDER: Female
ROOT: CHARLOTTE
ORIGIN: French
MEANING: Little and Womanly
YAY! Little and womanly...so like me ;)) tihih...mm...

maanantaina, joulukuuta 11, 2000

Over the Hedge online...I have it as a albums, and I forget that it was orginally online comic too. YAY! Im happy! See me jumping! Now Im going to read it everyday...I love it! :))

maanantaina, joulukuuta 11, 2000

Rose Is Rose, The Jain's Death...two fantastic online comic site again...Im amazed how much there is!

Tomorrow I have long day. I've been lazying around all sunday, getting more powers. Played cello, made pictures and stuff with 'puter and slept. I love it. Tomorrow I have to wake so early, go shop few make-up stuff, cello lesson, work, after work to Art Academy and get home like...mm...before 23 hopefully.

I hate when ppl know things before me. Mostly then when those things are about me. It's annyoing.

Today when I was playing cello...clock was something like 18.00 and I was in my own universum, suddenly my room filled with colors...someone was shooting fireworks outside. There was some big show going on, it lasted like forever and those were something I've never seen, shape of heart, almost size of sky, full of different colors glittering...somone just shoot like one huge fortune in the sky! But it was magical. It was so out from this world. I just stared out and screamed cause it was so beautiful.

Hour ago I was out with dog. It was so unnaturally warm. It should be winter. Clouds floated very fast and I wondered that why In earth it was not so dark...then I looked up and there was full moon hazying under those clouds. It made everything so light. Wind was caresing my skinn...it was so warm. I want minus degrees here, mr weather-man. Its winter, even should be...

In tuesday my mother has her 40year birthday. Horray.

Now...sleep. I'll wrote more tomorrow, maybe. I've been so totally empty after friday that I dont know what to feel, but that's life. :) Bless.

maanantaina, joulukuuta 11, 2000

lauantaina, joulukuuta 09, 2000

Im empty. I will write more when I get everything out.

Im alone, Cat is sleeping, Senni is in Larp (I would love to be there too...sob) and In kajaani theyre having HUGE little Xmas jamming session Rh Blues Band, JuJu and all. I would love to be there too, but no can do. Sari even promised to sing few songs, tho she bearly can stand 3min perioids cause she's so pregnant, baby will born in any minute...

My heart is broken. I feel so sick. But...let put this this way...Im use to it. Im so use to it, that It doesnt even hurt anymore, Im just so broken.

I miss Petrus, but he dont care. /me ignores that. Laters.

lauantaina, joulukuuta 09, 2000

perjantaina, joulukuuta 08, 2000

Soonish Im off from work and on my way to observatory. Let's see will Petrus talk me or now...if not, Im going to leave in same door opening. I dont want to idle in observatory with skirt and huge cello, tired as hell to see how my dear friend ignores me.

Friday. Ohoy. What a joy.

perjantaina, joulukuuta 08, 2000

It sad when something happends in irc. When someone you like dearly leave channel 'cause of stupid fight. So stubborn and sad. Well that's what life is. Ppl come in and ppl go away. And Im sick off when ppl promise something and then stab again on my back. Will this never end? I've noticed that Im happier alone, no-one who can hurt me, when one get a change. Im blind for life.

Ok. I'll shut up. That wc we have here...its broken again! Now its full of water and some on the floor too and goddamn I dont know what to do. Mario fixed it 3 weeks ago, but now its same again. I hate these old buildings and theyre old pipes. ARGH!

I had perfect cello lesson, I hate horrible gore dreams with lotsa of blood and I had ok work day but this...this make my day totally. Argh. So help me god.

perjantaina, joulukuuta 08, 2000

torstaina, joulukuuta 07, 2000

'sorry Im in love...' ARGH that song roll around in my head. Annoying, or what? Ah. I had nice day in work. I had few nice custormers and then two about 10 year old boys that came to sit front of the place, stared me thru the window, make pervers handmarks, kicked window and then shouted 'hey bitch, can you do blowjob for us...' It was the time that in my head something snapped and I went out and 'fuck you both. You not our customers so sod off!'...and stuff like that. Oh god I hate it. I hate it. I hate it. I hate it. I goddamn hate it! SO much. I hate when mans even little boys start to act like that. I've seen it so much. Im sick of it. Im so sick off it that I want to scream. But then, came peace, and I irc'ed and had a bunch of nice ppl smiling at me and one even said that I make good coffee. So...How's that.

And after work, I runned to Cafe Noir listen interesting conversations, reboot my head from all that crap I had at work and then later to be 'part' of conversation...aahha. Im too shy.

Soonish Senni is going to use her 8 last pics from film to shoot some stuff for my new desing. New pictures of me. We'll see. Hopefully theyre be fine and dandy, so I could really use 'em.

Im going to dye my head more reddish. I think something a bit un natural something 'anime' kawaii. Im going to get back in this color at summer, but now In winter...I want something totally clear and sappy. Aah. Coffee.

I miss Petrus, tho I think he dont really need my company now. He's totally snappy when he answer to my sms and such. And I really could need a friend. Oh well. Tomorrow cello lesson, Im going to play like hell.

Life's sad somehow. Ppl come in and then they disappear. I have some humans who have been part of my reality longer, but Im sad, when theres just visitors too. Maybe its 'cause Im so poor to keep contact. Maybe its cause my heart is made of stone (tho not anymore, im bursting lava). No, I think its cause Im poor to keep contact. I want to fall in love. Its...mm... no...how should I say this...I could fall in love, really, all the time, and I do. but I dont let it out, I enjoy it in private and keep it there. Then its gone. I want to open myself and let go. Its just that someone should walk half way towards me. Mm. Oh damn.

Utena kick ass. *kawaii*

I let my tamagotchi live again. Reason? I love it. Its so cute. And also, it have a clock, and now I need clock cause Im always late, and now Im working woman, I dont want to be late. And other reason is that I want something to do when Im at work. Im so bored there sometimes.
/me is tired.
oh. In monday after work I have to go to Turku's art academy. That photography project is starting and I need to go there to do make up. Im not yet in those pictures. Were just starting with one man, who's going in army after Xmas. If I remember righty.
Im out of my mind.
Ora o nameru na yo!

torstaina, joulukuuta 07, 2000

ahahah
'Nyt riitti, sanoi shamaani'.
LOL! :)) Ok Im tired. or then Im...very very bored.
Yes - bored. that is what I am. Bored I am.

Studio Julmahuvi, one finnish humor show...aah theyre having new stuff and its on tv soonish! I love it I love it I love it. Im so happy. They make best finnish-comedy ever! Im happy to know that Im able to have a laugh again.

yay. I love Postman Blues. I have to rent it soon again when my sister is able to watch it with me. I know she'll love it too. I have to go to watch Tabu aka Gohatto (japanese film which sound very good, and Takeshi Kitano is acting in it)...and his new movie Brother...I hope it will come here soonish. Aah. Im happy.

torstaina, joulukuuta 07, 2000

Aah...I love online comics...my everyday read is Sinfest (gotta love the cat and the dog in it...ahahah). New ones are megatokyo and the think h line...which is a bit sick and full of strange humor...aahha something to do when Im at work.

Yes, tomorrow work again. Gotta go sleep. Im broke, I just count my money situation *panic* and its Xmas. Oh fuck fuck fuck. My mother has 40years bday at 12.12...and I'll get my next paycheck 20.12. Sigh. uuh. I dont think about it now, I think about it tomorrow.

And also tomorrow after my work...again...Larpcafe meeting. I can hardly wait. Bless!

torstaina, joulukuuta 07, 2000

Oh. It's independenceday today in Finland. So, I had free day, now work. I've been lazying around all day, sleeping, hanging around, watching movies...Yesterday I rented Fear and loathing in last vegas (starring Johnny Depp) which was great. I laught a lot.

Another movie I took was most beautiful glittering Takeshi Kitano's movie called Kikujiro. I had its music soundtrack already. I just found it and rent it right away. It was amazing, I laughed and cried and felt so amazing after it. I just cried so helplesly cause I was so touched and happy. Im fan of Kitano, as actor and director. I've loved every movie I've seen. This one was amazing, like Hana-bi too, but I think it has more the real taste of life in it. Oh my. Im floating.

Well I went to return those today and rent another japanese film called Postman Blues (aka Posutoman burusu). It was amazing too. It was g-r-e-a-t! I laughed So goddamn much. It's awesome. Beautiful, exciting and oh so full of black-humor, just the way I like it. And one actor in it looks exactly like my sisters boyfriend. every face and move he makes in that movie is totally like Tuomas. I had so much fun to watch it. Ahha. :) That movie also showed life with sparkle in the eye and love with somehow real way...it was full of real feelings, to it was totally out from this world. I loved that red bike. I wanna one. *big grin*
This is why Im happy right now.

torstaina, joulukuuta 07, 2000

tiistaina, joulukuuta 05, 2000

Now Im all alone again.
I got card from ali] today! Aaah! He's so sweet. I have to send my card and such soonish...that it will be in time. I also got first letter from Snufkin...gotta answer into it soonish. I have to do a lot of thinks. I just dont have enought time!! Argh!

I want to go close to ocean. I want to go in the beach were all I can see its water, no little islands or rocks...just plain water roaming towards me. I want to sit on the sand till sunset down and start to get colder and darker. I want it so bad.

Ekhowl said that he might stop by here...havent seen him all day. Yawn, Im bored. Ok...I have 4days off in Xmas. I've been thinking that it will be too expensive for me if I just go there and spend like...few days. And it would broke my heart. I spend my time front of my computer making new desing in my pages and work. Sigh. I dont know...

I've started to wrote two new melody and lyrics. Aah. Im happy when I can do something like that. Also I've start to be busy with that photography project, cause Im doing make-up for everyone and also Im 'model'...but still He dont need me than in few times front of the camera but I always have to be there somewhere at background...Gee...Im going to loose my mind. cause I really have to do my best now...mm.

Last night / Today I saw strange dreams. In night I saw that I was talking with ekhowl, I dont remember in what situation...I also saw another dream, which I dont remember clearly. Anyway. Today when I woke up I fall asleep when I was drinking coffee and relaxing on the sofa. I saw very charlie's angel-type of dreams, where I was hero. OK...There was a beach where a bunch of people and I was. All my friends and then strangers. There was boat, those huge ones waiting in deeper water and ppl just jumped around in water and party. Then some madman came there, did something, I stole helicopter and started to chase him. I didnt know how to use that plane, so I was half way in air and water. I pushed buttons and blowed few huge bombs and every one were like hurray! Tho, I almost killed everyone, cause I just shoot those things around. I smashed everything with that helicopter. Ok, then after that perioid I join in to party and met every friend of mine. Then I start to search Nobody and found a basket that was full of plastic pockets and in everyone was one cat. And I knew which was Nobody, tho they all were black and yellow eyed. He was sitting in one plastic pocket and stared at me. I told him that he have to wait, cause he cannot swim and we all wanna party my ninja kung fu wannabe fictory! Eeeh. Then I met a man and then I woke up when phone started to rang. Damnation! I havent seen any interesting dreams in ages...Blaah.

Today after work Im going to go rent few movies. Tomorrow is our independenceday and Im having free day! Im going to sleep long! Aahh. How in earth Im this happy about it? Mum said that I cannot then take any japanese movies...I think I use my own money then. Harhar ;) We'll see.

tiistaina, joulukuuta 05, 2000

Aah. Damn I hate banks. Today I was few minute late open this place, cause I was waiting my turn in bank. Gotta hate it...Anyway...its this time...Xmas. Everyone want money from bank and spend them to things to give...and for food. One thing I have about Xmas...If I want to give something to someone I dont want to give it cause its habit. You know? I dont like to send cards in valentines day and such. Oh I love this season, but...I dont want that ppl thinks that cause now I give or send something, its just because of Christmas!

Last night I wrote long post for yuri...my japanese e-pal. I want to send her card, but Im so busy with this work that I dont have time...always when Im off every place are closed...almost.Oh well...I think I can handle this. Oh...Senni came in. Laters.

tiistaina, joulukuuta 05, 2000

maanantaina, joulukuuta 04, 2000

ahahha.
[18:10] < Genoveva > mm. I want own domain. what should I take. Im having little poll about it.
[18:10] < @raz > www.thepunklady.com
funny thing is that its free. But no, I dont want it. Now Im dazzeling between wholelottalove.nu and prideandjoy.nu. God, How hard can something like this be! 8)

maanantaina, joulukuuta 04, 2000

ok. After long chat with few irc friend...www.prideandjoy.nu. I quess I'll take it in january. Ok...but still if you have your splendid idea, share it with me ;)

maanantaina, joulukuuta 04, 2000

Im bored. Im at work.

Today I woke up totally early. But I get more time to sleep when my cello teacher cancelled my lesson. Its in friday now. at 11.00. Gotta remember that. Well. Nicey. I get more time to play. What a feeling. My muscles ache. Im getting same flu that Senni had last thursday. I dont want it. Cause...well I have to work, and its horrible to have fever when you have to smile and be happy when customers are around.

Im in good mood, tho. Eka visited me here. She was on her way to her japanese lesson. I should start to make Xmas cards and post them. I checked Blue Apple calendar. Me and my boss have been very busy and havent been able to talk about Xmas holidays. Now I saw it...He have marked 4 days for me. 4!!! My usual plan was that I should go to Kajaani spend Xmas with father. Cause last year I was with mother. Ok...Now...it cost so much. And 1 day to travel, 3 full days there, then home and work. Then few days at work and newyear is free. I dont want to be here at new years eve. In Kajaani theyre having big once in a year inside party where everybody are. Good music, food and company. And...I want to be there! So much! And Im only worker here, cause Mario (my boss) keep surfcity and he cannot be in two places same time. So I have to spend Xmas here. I dont know yet what Im going to do, maybe I have little conversation with Mario about this. Sigh. I dont want to be alone whole Xmas. Pentti is workin, my sis of course is having long brake from her school and she's able to go to north. And she's going to take Tuomas with her. And...oh well. I made so beautiful Xmas plan with Virpi and Dad. I was so sure that this Xmas will be great. I dont remember when was last time when I spend this season with my dad. Sigh. Sigh. Ok, enough. I end my babling here. dot.

Im going to get domain for myself :D how about...mm...www.wholelottalove.nu (com is already in use)...no. I want *.com! Its not that stylish! ;D or www.prideandjoy.nu! I have to decide. Which one! Help me! Well...someone, tell me your ideas. or then Im dull and take just www.genogrrrlie.com. Duh.

Oh first customers just came in. Yay! :) and then another...uuh start to be busy here. God Im hungry...I just have like...1hour to go so happyhappyjoyjoy! Laters.

maanantaina, joulukuuta 04, 2000

sunnuntaina, joulukuuta 03, 2000

Im like totally lazy.

I played cello today! almost 3h! And I can say that it sounded fantasitic! I dont remember when I made it make sounds like that. Im proud. I dont remember when I really felt that good to play anything. Anyway...

S7L came here at saturday. He left today. I had great time!! Good music, good company, conversation...it was like from another universe...Im totally tired. I've played with Nobody all night and ate huge pizza and then bunch of ice-cream and fighted with Petrus via sms. I think he's going to talk with me now, I'll see that tomorrow. God, I hate these little fights we have from time to time. My human-relationships just dont work. I would love to write my stories here, but I cant. It would make too much noise.

Im going to make some songs now. I have to work Al Dente a bit...I have to write to Jukka tomorrow...Sorb-i-tol have been very lazy (cause we've been busy with out works and also we've been sick a lot) and such...

Xmas is around. I can see it...When I came back to home from trainstation bus was full of ppl with things they've bought for friends. Im broke. :/

I hope its not that important. Eh? Anyway...

Im searching some 'cute' (harhar) boxers to Petrus. I asked what should I get, he said 'boxers', I said ok. So...For myself...mm...nothing...for Senni...mm...*tihih* dunno :P

Ooh...btw, If someone wants to get me something, here is my list: Nobel price, peace in the world and mm life? Ehehhahha. ooh! Now I know what I want: dear Santa. I would love to get some snow.. Here you go. And I heard that there is no Santa. How so. Someone explain me. ;) Who is that man with he's HoHo motto?

Utena soundtrack is something really sparkling. Im full of energy.

I write some real stuff tomorrow at work. There's always pointing finger somewhere when home and online. Laters.

sunnuntaina, joulukuuta 03, 2000

lauantaina, joulukuuta 02, 2000

Im listening hana-bi soundtrack, chatting with S7L, feeling extremely tired after workday, after it observing in cold night wearing same outfit that I put on when I went to work (skirt/kilt what ever), after watching everything from our new brand huge widescreen tv that we bought now. Its brilliant! Silver colored, philips, new, beautiful picture, dolby sound. Its something totally...great. I've been watching X-files from 14" tv too long.

OK...Ahah. I had so much fun at observation. When I came there, it was all clear sky, I was happy and totally hungry. It was so beautiful and still warm. When I came in first I burst a laugh. I was so happy to meet all. And then we all laugh. We chatted and freak out for hour and then me, Juhana and Jani went to Grill to get some food. I bought fish and chips which was super. As always. My favorite. So yummy. I also bought two bottles of Ginger Ale to feed my urge to get something sweet. And those bottles are so cute! I bring one home with me. I think Im going to add it in my 'beautiful bottles' collection. Sometimes I use those beautiful bottles as a vase or something like that. mm...Gotta clean this place. I have papers and pens all around da place. Horrible.

I was some clothes now. Hand-wash. Im too tired to play with machines.

S7L inform me that ok he's coming here and yes I have to be at the trainstation at 13. =) Ok. That's fine to me =) Nicey that he come. I just dont have no idea what shall we do, but I dont see that as a problem. We always have fun jsut idling around. Hopefully it's beautiful weather that I can show him some beautiful places from city. And I miss our irl chat's so that will be great. I should inform yev and ekhowl about this, but its tomorrow. I think that maybe he's coming a bit later, depends how he's going to wake up and such. I dont really count on that. ;))

This just a perfect day, feed animal in the zoo, then later some movies too, then go home...

Where having tolkien quiz in my ideal channel (I made the club, Finrod made the chan. Its usually our meeting place, but now theres bunch of tolkien faq-heads answering in questions...its interesting.) #LifeWithoutAngst-club. Im tired. I would love to talk with Finrod but boys are boys, and right now having fun together with that quiz. Im too shy to answer to anything, so Im just watching. ;)

Now everyone is sleeping. Nobody is totally happy about that box where tv was into. He loves to play in those, they make weird sounds and theyre cool. And...well...that's really big one after all. Tihih! :)

I would really love to see some ranma½ right now. Im dying to see some anime. I've been in anime-blindness too long. Im suffering.

As you know Im half-joking. Im not dying. Im not...feeling too bad. I just need dreams. Nighty.

lauantaina, joulukuuta 02, 2000

perjantaina, joulukuuta 01, 2000

When I was still sleeping at morning I heard that mail arrived. Usually its huge fhumps sound. Today just one flip. I remember that I was thinking that ok...theres some one only and huge bill. When I went to look, there was single postcard. Nothing more. Usually we got lot of everything or then nothing. Now...just single postcard with nice picture and text 'texas'. When I turned it around to read other side I find out that it was card from Scott...It was quickly here from there. Its always (well not always cause this was first time, if we dont count cards that I've got from irc friends) pleasure to get mail from stranger! :)) This one made me totally happy cause...I dont usually get mail. And it was cute. Anyway...3 mins and Im off. Ah. Clear sky. Im so goddamn happy! :)

perjantaina, joulukuuta 01, 2000

Its friday. Everyone is having somekind of little Xmas parties tonight but not me. Tho, im not really even mood for party party. Aah. Janne send sms that he's going to mail me soonish. Yay. I really love his mails, theyre best in the world. So long and full of everything.

Happy Birthday Säde! 20 years already, gee, Your now starting to grown old. ;) She's having party at Helsinki. No money to go. And really I dont want to go from work to Hki and then party all night. Im already death tired. But not really. I just want to sleep, cause its nice. I love to sleep. I could sleep forever. Tonight, I mean.

Congrats pippin, you got the job! *fanfare* I knew you'll do it.

Does anyone ever read this mindless bable I write all the time? Does this anything make any point? Sigh. I love this cherry coke. Its cold and sparkling. Damn ekhowl, he said he propably come here today, but he didnt write anything in his blog and I dont have any idea will he come. Well....just 2h then Im gone.

perjantaina, joulukuuta 01, 2000

Its great great weather today!! Its so awesome! No clouds! No rain! Just empty blue clear sky which lets sun warm and fill every place. It was great to sit in bus on my way to work...read book as the landscaped and cars past me by and feel the sun on my skin, and see light dazzeling on the paper of the book I read. Its beautiful. Its been so long since I saw totally clear daily sky. Its been too long. over and month of rain and grey everything. I got so much energy, tho I was dreath tired. My boss awake me today and I dont even remember anything about that phonecall. Ahha :D

Anyway...Its amazing. Also, cause today is friday which means that its time for observatory. To meet all my friends and aah finally its friday that has good weather so we can really observe something! Im wearing a skirt so it will be cold, but who cares. I've missed stars so long that I dont care If I catch cold, its life! :)) Kiah!

Yesterday I was home after 21. After work I went to cafe Noir to join in that Larp meeting that is now in every thursday at same time. its starting at 18, but I join in after my work. And I had fun. Chatting with one stranger who was one bloke Anna met in one Larp and was now visiting in Turku...tihih. Anyway he was great :D And I met a lot of familiar faces. I was in tired but great mood and mostly I listen what ppl was chatting about. And there was almost everyone from that photography project...So Unto came to chat with me and Senni about it. Damn, I should really mail about few things and idea I have for it. Damn. Damn. *mumbling* Anyway Im going to take that cafe noir thing as my weekly habit. Its nice to go there after work. Tho, leaving place which is cafe and where I drink like 2l coffee at day...to meet others in cafe where you have to buy something (and of course I get coffee) to get in...harhar :))

Ooh...5 customers already! When its better weather ppl visit here more than usually. Im keeping my eyes open.

I want to see some kenshin badly.

perjantaina, joulukuuta 01, 2000

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